Lifestory

Are all of these things make sense?

2 Comments

We are living on a planet called earth. Each of us has their own stories to tell. My story is about my plans for life. Digging up from its most inner core, I admit that I’ve been so persistent to be the best version I can become. The way I see things, I want to do it in a way that I could attain the dream achievement of my life.

So I asked myself, “Are all of these things make sense?” At first, I doubted myself if I can really pursue what I wanted in life. I was trying to create different conclusions asking myself about my future plans. At the end of the day, we all lay down in bed  and say ” Life ” is what we make it.

I did face dramas, all the craps, failures , frustrations, criticisms, and other bullshits in life that made me realize that “SHIT HAPPENS” indeed. In fact, I am used to it by now. In my almost 19 years of existence, I realized that life is on how we really deal with it.

I keep on reminding myself that everything is according to God’s perfect plan for my life. Even though problems come along and obstacles pave its way to me, I will never be afraid to conquer it all because I trust God. I have all the issues in my life that could slow down my life’s progress but, how could I deny the fact that God is with me? That I just have to trust on Him and rely to whatever circumstances I might encounter, knowing He is with me. I am thankful for this life He give to me.

Even though, it is not perfect, I still choose to follow Him. He knows the way and the truth in my life. Challenges in school makes me wanna scream and give it up. But the promise of good future of Christ motivates me a lot.

Perseverance is essential in order for us to attain good results. But before anything else, I still make it to accept the fact that life on earth is a temporary journey that will come to pass. What matters most is our relationship with the One above who made us feel the happiness, the love, and the sorrows here on earth. Living is easy. In the past, myself used to struggle on things I thought that really matters the most.

As I went along my quest, I found out that this is not my final destination yet. Towards good goals in life, determination is a must. The heart needs to be heard, and our desires in life need attention. Equipped with perseverance and hard work are just recipes to reach our dreams.

The things I’ve lost in the daily battles of my life do not matter anymore. Because, I only gain in life. According to Job 1:21, “21 He said, “I was born with nothing, and I will die with nothing. The Lord gave, and now he has taken away. May his name be praised!”. Now, I come to my senses and concluded that this is the truth. The medals, awards, money, properties, and jewelries, I cannot bring all of these when I die. That’s why, material or worldly things don’t matter. What matters most is on how we turned out to be. Being molded by God’s grace and His will for our life brings us to wherever we are today.

Every decision I make, I always make it to the point that I let God know about it. I asked God if this is the right thing to say or to do. I always wanted to make God as daily part of my life. I may not know what the future beholds, but all I ever believe are the promises of Christ. According to Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you, plans not to harm you but to prosper you, to provide you a future and a hope.” I hold on to the words He left for me. I should not worry about what tomorrow comes for tomorrow will worry about itself. So let him have your worries and cares for He is always thinking about you and watching everything that concerns you.(Peter 5:7).

In everything I wanted to do, I want to be happy. But being happy for myself is not the only thing I need. My greatest achievement in life is to make my parents happy. Oh, seeing their smiles and their laughter soothes my heart. And the most important thing of all, is to please God glorifying His name in every single day of my life. I love God, and I am not ashamed to tell the world how I feel. I’m trying to live life to the fullest, enjoying every moment, giving value to every little conversations with the people I meet and of course, in top of all, to love, and to feel love. Everything else makes sense to me now. It is clear to say…LIFE IS SIMPLY AMAZING. 

Special Issue: Barefooted-Wearing the Pink Shoes

2 Comments

“And suddenly you know… It’s time to start something new and trust the magic of beginnings.”

Too often, I forget how to pick up myself from the ground and begin again.

Almost always, I stay back and just cry sittin’ along the rocky road of life.

–this is the way of my life back then.

I fall, I rise, I make mistakes, I live, I learn. I am human, not perfect. I have been hurt, but I am alive. I think of what a precious privilege is to be alive- to breathe, to think, to enjoy, and to chase the things I love.

Sometimes, there is sadness in my journey, but there is also lots of beauty. We must keep on putting one foot in front of the other even when we hurt, for we will never know what is waiting for us just round the bend.

According to my favorite cartoon character Winnie the Pooh,”Life is a journey to be experienced, not a problem to be solved.” He is actually right. Every little things we do counts on what we think matters the most. Since we are challenged by waves of problems almost everyday, we became worried on how to fix everything else. But as we come to think of it, time is running constantly. If life ceases due to the bumpy road we are walking through, it’s not being alive anymore.

To be alive to feel pain.

To be alive is to continue the journey despite of harshness of life.

“So often, we become so focused on the finish line that we fail to enjoy the journey.” Life’s not a marathon to run fast than anyone else. Why not enjoy the scenery in front of you. Take it all one day at a time and enjoy the journey.

“I hope the days come easy, and the moments pass slow, and each road leads you to where you want to go.”

WE ARE BORN BAREFOOTED. Simply to say that we gotta ride the Pink Shoes of life. You have to do what is right for yourself. Nobody is walking in your shoes.Simply being free. Sometimes, the people around you won’t understand your journey. They don’t need to, it’s not for them.

Just hold the vision, and trust the process. . .

“Some journeys take us far from home. Some adventures lead us to our destiny.”- C.S. Lewis, The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe. If your path is more difficult, it is because your calling is higher. You don’t always need a plan. Sometimes, you just need to BREATHE, trust, LET GO and see what happens. 🙂

Enjoy the journey. Live life & enjoy each day. Every day is a new present waiting to be unwrapped. Unwrap it slowly, enjoy it, and be thankful. ♥

Actually, all of us walk in this world barefooted. As we try to realize it, without the protection from our shoes, we could feel the earth from where we stand and as long as we do not stop from walking, it actually hurts stepping all the rocky road and muddy plains that slow us down. Remember, the struggle is part of the story.

Whenever you find yourself doubting how far you can go, just remember how far you have come. Remember everything you have faced, all the battles you have won, and all the fears you have overcome. 🙂 Ganbatte kudasai!

“But be brave enough to travel the unknown path, and learn what you are capable of barefooted- wearing the pink shoes.”

-AJ2k15

All “Throw” It

1 Comment

“You can’t keep misery from coming, but you don’t have to give it a chair to sit on.”

Everybody has gone into something that changed them, right? As we look back to the bigger picture of it, somehow, it affected our present existence.

I have my own problems. You have your own. Have you ever thought of keeping it all your life?

Then you might answer me:

“What else can I do?”

At this moment, throw it.

Because you can’t just let your problems eat you. Being digested is like being ruined. And I tell you, your life is at stake.

You should live everyday like if it’s your last. Don’t let your problems run through your system. Time is running. And every second lost, is time wasted.

Life as we know it, is not perfect. But people tend to achieve a perfect life. We plan for what we think is the best for us despite of the imperfectness of things as long as it’ll make us happy.

What we must accept is the fact that even though everyone has their own personal problems what they do is to keep on waking up and live for their dreams. Because suffering is just temporary. You can take the venture to discover that it is just a part of life. Without the chili and spicy flavor , do you think living would be worth the taste? Without the hollows and bumps, do you think life would be worth the ride?

It is not the destination but it’s the journey that matters the most. You, yourself knows exactly how heavy the load you’re carrying right now. But, it’s not how heavy the load is, but on how you carry it through this adventure. Never lose hope to reach the dreams that you once thought.

You might think that life seems to be unfair. But I tell you, it is not ! Because our life is written by the same pen. The author of my life is the same author as yours. You might lose hope at the bumpy roads, but lift up your arms and get ready to be lifted up. For He is with you.

Photo0003

These days…

2 Comments

*Sigh

Well, there is so much to say yet so little time to make it.

I can hardly breath as I write this down-my bottled feelings, my hidden desires, my deepest fears and all my weakness I left behind me.

All of it… Just all of it. I might just sat down and weep. But Oh Please…? I don’t have to waste much more time getting the punch through it.

Yes, I admit it, I held grief for someone. I can’t deny the fact that I’m one of the pretty martyr ladies that have been betrayed by someone they trusted. It’s an unfortunate event for me. I never imagined something like this before. I guess I have to carry the load on my heart for a longer time since when that punk slapped me the truth.

How I wish, I never got into serious relationship that easy. But it happened. I pity my old self. That’s why these days seems to achieve medication, through meditation. After I finally realized that its not worth it anymore, I’ve accepted that fact that its over. Once its over, Its Totally Over.

There is much more waiting for me at the end of the road. Something much bigger, much greater. I seemed to have doubts at first, but I know what I’m doing since I do know where I’m going to.

I’m trying to live it up by myself with the guidance of above. It is working out in some ways, my team partner Jesus I trust, I thank Him so much.

These days, I feel neutral- and I’d rather be called a school girl rather than a bourgeois.*sigh

I have so many things to do. So many things for me to keep busy and trying to realize my existence here on this planet. I have a goal. I have a dream. I must keep it up. The fire burning inside of me would like to walk this journey with curiosity, and hunger for knowledge and end up being satisfied in life with the most important people in my life- My Mama, Papa, Sis 🙂 This is all for you.Photo0833

I sat

Studies First

5 Comments

As I start to realize that I have grown such strong attachment to someone than anybody else.

This time, I have driven all my emotions to an end so that I can ease the pain.

I held tears but I can’t.

I hid all the grudge but I can’t.

And it seems that I was the only one suffering to this type of teenage problem in which I never expected to have.

Somehow my childhood days were colorful, I wonder why I changed and became an “EMO” all the way of entering in my college years.

I have decided not to be drowned by tears while studying and so I have come up with an idea to stop something I have been doing for the past two years.

And that’s….

TO STOP LOVING A PERSON

whom you thought that will love you more than you do.

whom you thought that will bring out the best in you.

whom you thought that will never leave you no matter what.

whom you thought that will be holding your hands forever.

whom you thought that will never make you cry.

whom you thought that will make a thousands laughs for you.

whom you thought that will see to it that you’re okay.

whom you thought that will text you and call you every night.

whom you thought that will handle your feelings carefully.

whom you thought that will not take you for granted.

whom you thought that will be there for you when you have problems.

whom you thought that will help you out.

whom you thought that will strengthen you.

whom you thought that will keep his promises of “4ever”

whom you thought that will never leave…

BUT HE LEFT.

All this emotional expos of mine are just “pautwas”.

In the sense that I’ve tried my best for that particular person, but my best wasn’t good enough to make him stay in my life. Am I too cruel? too demanding? too OA? too ugly? too pretty? (oh, well)

Somewhat, I have come to the point where I felt hopelessness in life. From that moment, I realized that I made a mistake for giving myself wholeheartedly to a man who’s not worth my tears. Doing my best is maybe just a piece of shit for him.

What does it take to commit yourself to give time and effort for the one you love?

Is it that hard?

My heart was crushed by this person whom I thought is “THE ONE”.

Seems like I was wrong.

Even though I have been experiencing heartaches for the past 2 years since I met him, loved him, but I didn’t want to hold unto grudges towards him. I am a forgivable person and also, I don’t want to tear my heart apart by being mad always.

I may be single for now, but I know I am not alone with the presence of Jesus who is my Savior in my life. Moving on is easy if I will just have to trust on His words: “I am the way, the truth, and the life”, I believe that through Him and in Him, I will achieve “PEACE” in my heart.

In addition, I will just have to focus on what’s important in my life. Knowing my priorities is a must. I am a goal-oriented person who wants to be a Chemical Engineer someday. Of course, I always prayed and hoping to reach my dreams soon. I know I am one day closer to the answers just as the time flies.

I might lose my objectives if I will choose to be miserable all the time. Why not smile and let the world wonder why?

Right? 🙂

For now, I will trust for God’s perfect timing.

Love is not a fairy tale here on earth. I know my life is just temporary here on land but with JESUS CHRIST who lifted up my spirit, with my family who became my inspiration, with friends who supported me and with all the gifts/blessings of God that keeps me going, I am greatly motivated.

Studies first, my passion for studying will never end.

Let me end this article with this saying, “I may be bent but not broken, because if God brings you to it, He will brings you through it..”

God bless everyone. Love Love Love 🙂

-SoulWriter2k14